With All Due Humility, A Job's A Job...

The height of humiliation, according to the South China Morning Post, is to work as a domestic helper. Try telling that to the thousands of Filipinas in Hong Kong and around the world, many with university degrees they can't put to good use. But, it seems, taking a job as a housekeeper is too embarrassing in China.

Let me tell you a true story. The only two points of significant difference between this story and the one in the newspaper are that firstly the subject (let's call her Mary) did not have a University degree, and secondly her life commenced many years ago.

Mary was born in one of the toughest parts of Glasgow, one of six children. Her Father, she said, was a good man because he always made sure his children had something to wear on their feet when they went to school, unlike many of the other children around them. The soles of the shoes were changed regularly, when there was a new piece of cardboard available. Mary was a bright child. Never out of the top two or three at school and where her worst subject was geography where she "only" got marks in the 70 and 80 percent levels. This, despite receiving punishment (usually the strap) almost every day for being late in the classroom. It was only some years later her teacher found out that Mary was late because she had to take her younger sister to school first, and the younger one started later than Mary. But, said Mary, she didn't want to go around making excuses. 

When she was 14 years old Mary had to stop school because the family needed her to work to earn money, so she entered domestic service as a housekeeper.

Ultimately the second world war intervened, and Mary joined the army where, due to her skill and intelligence, she rapidly rose through the ranks and became a gunnery sergeant, receiving high commendations and top marks wherever she went. As the war was coming to a close Mary married another sergeant - a commando who she had met when he was doing some training. Sadly he died just before the war ended leaving Mary a widow with a child on the way.

To cut what could be a very long story into a manageable tale, Mary found work as a cook/housekeeper to a family who were prepared to take her on with a baby. The job, managing an extremely large house was, to say the least, demanding. The employers were reasonable, but they entertained large numbers frequently and it was not uncommon for Mary to be up at 6 in the morning and not be in bed until 11 at night having had a full day cleaning and cooking. She was never known to complain - accepting (rightly or wrongly) that you play with the deck you are dealt. You take the opportunities when they arise, but you get on with life.

Mary was involved with the same family, parents and children, until at the age of 72 she decided she should slow down and stop full time work. Throughout her working life she never asked for an increase in pay - preferring instead to rely on the provision of a roof over her head and the pension she received from the army for the loss of her husband, as well as by then an old age pension.

Her intelligence never wavered. She reached the London finals of The Times crossword puzzle in her 70s, but declined to attend them because she did not want to be in any form of public eye, or the pressure that went with it.

Her humility, her grounding, her loyalty and her total lack of selfishness have provided for others a base from which to work. But humiliation for working as a domestic helper?? It would not have crossed her mind. A job, she would say, is a job - and if you can do something with the few opportunities you can find in life, then grasp them.

Happily, Mary today is in her 90th year and as sharp and as fiercely independent as ever. She lives comfortably and quietly, but of the headline in the newspaper today she would probably have a few choice things to say about "too high expectations", and to stop whining - be happy you even have a job, as there are many who don't.

I shall speak about it to "Mary" when I call her tonight - although I will call her Mum!

    

Comments

[Robert Chesney]

Great qualities! All too rare nowadays, unfortunately, to the considerable detriment of society!
How good that those qualities have continued in 'Mary's' following generation, & no doubt those qualities will have been passed on to the subsequent generation.
Pleased to hear that your mother remains alive & well. Also, how nice (& possibly reassuring) to have longevity in the old genes!!

[hans olijve]

it only shows that with a perceived or socalled low paying or status occupation you should never rob your self of your dignity, esteem or your brain and the power of it. Unfortunately the PH government is proud of their export product sending all the money home to their loved ones.It is a pity as the government should focus more on the means how the OFW can earn their money in their homecountry and see their kids/family grow up.

[Cristina Eldon]

Pop- that was a great piece of writing...

[Daphne]

I believe I asked the right question, whether the leading role of the story was remained anonymous or not. That really matters.
And thanks for sharing your story.

[jeremy]

Well, I'll never!

Many people who have never met David Eldon think of you as a posh Brit but you are truly a self made man (with some guidance from a remarkable woman of course).

I learnt something today reading this post. Which doesn't happen very often.

Sleeves up, hands to the deck, and we'll make something out of this fine mess.

[Spike]

I think one of the reasons that people may view such work as "the height of humiliation" is because so many of the domestic helpers are treated poorly by their employers.

I've had the same woman working for me for more than 7 years. When I first hired her, I felt that it was important for me to make her comfortable and happy in my home - that if I succeeded then she would do a better job for me. And as time went by and I got to know her better, I learned about the sacrifices she was making in order to provide a better life for her family - only seeing her son once a year, splitting from her husband, etc. Seven years later, I don't consider her a servant, I consider her to be part of my family.

Your excellent post here should be more widely disseminated - get this translated into Chinese and run in the local newspapers!

[David Eldon]

Thank you for the comment and, needless to say, I couldn't agree more. With "Burns Night" just passed and therefore fresh in the memory, and using a title from an earlier post, his poem "Man's Inhumanity to Man" rings loud and clear. It seems that the term "human being" - which should apply to everyone - somehow gets lost in translation in certain quarters.

As for getting this translated into Chinese, perhaps I will see what I can do - but getting the newspapers to print it is another matter. A Chinese version on the Blog perhaps?

[Sandy So]

Mr. Eldon, thanks for sharing Mary's story, it's so great. She has intelligence, and also a good sense of humour, I think.
I totally agreed with you, "stop whining - be happy you even have a job, as there are many who don't."
Looking for more sharing.

[Spike]

My suggestion - offer an exclusive interview giving your thoughts on Hong Kong's economy but tell them the "price" is that they have to run "A Job's a Job" before you'll sit down with their reporter. Quid pro quo ...

[David Eldon]

Used to try that, but the reporters always agreed - and never quite got round to it!
Had a nice offer tonight from a journalist to translate it into Chinese for me, though, and I might just take her up on it.

[Sukyi]

Please leave the job for me. I am sure I can do a good job. I almost had tears in my eyes. Sukyi

[hoito]

thanks for your sharing.
I was moved and broke into tears.
Hoito, Hongkong